Why did I get involved in all this in the first place? The story of this pair, strangely enough, begins a few months before conception because it’s necessary to outline the whole situation that led to conception.
First of all, my two children, now referred to as “the older ones,” were born in February, exactly three days and three years apart (both on Wednesdays).
Secondly, I have a best friend, Ksyu, who married my best friend six months before my wedding, and she gave birth to two children, each of whom is about six months older than each of my older ones. The pattern is so obvious that my mom periodically asked if Ksyu was pregnant, because if she was, then I would have to be too!
And thirdly, the coronavirus. Where would we be without it in recent history? In short, we live in the VDNKh area, and my husband works in Odintsovo, an hour and a half away by public transport one way. And while everyone was staying at home and trying to work remotely with kids jumping around, my husband had to be present in the office five days a week. And his mom also lives in Odintsovo! And he made the brilliant decision to stay at his mom’s from Monday to Friday night to minimize trips on public transport, not to get infected himself, and not to “bring” the virus to us.
And so, it’s the end of April 2020. Ksyu is pregnant, and I’ve been at home with the kids for almost a month without my husband’s help and without the opportunity to even take a walk, but trying to work. And against this background, I realize that if I get pregnant now, in May, then the third child will be born again in February, three years after the previous one. It will be nice. And Ksyu, again, is pregnant.
When my husband comes home for the first May weekend, I joyfully share this idea with him and add that according to the calendar, I have a high probability of conception right now. My husband categorically refuses, citing the lack of money, lack of space in the apartment, and the fact that he hasn’t even recovered from the infancy of the older ones yet. I’m sad, but I accept his arguments. And just in case, he doesn’t even kiss me all weekend.
The next weekend he comes again, we go to bed, and he starts hitting on me, which leads to unprotected sex. (His version of events – he was sleeping, then woke up, and I was jumping on him!). After sex, my husband said something like “Well, we didn’t want a third one!” but I reassured him, saying that the fertile period had already passed.
As a married 35-year-old aunt with two children, how to tell my mom about the pregnancy
And in June, my period didn’t come… Two lines on the test appeared instantly, bright and unequivocal. I went to the doctor, and she scheduled an ultrasound (the first one, to establish the fact of pregnancy) for the significant date – June 22. And the “psychological ballet” began because I was very ashamed to admit to my parents about the third pregnancy, but the parents were eager to take me and the kids to the country house. I had to come up with some ridiculous reasons why we couldn’t go to the country house, without mentioning the ultrasound. Plus, knowing that we had twins in the family, for two weeks I was afraid that I might have twins. Somehow in the first and second pregnancies, I dreamed about it, but in the third one, I didn’t want it. But Ksyu reassured me and said she “feels” that I only have one child there.
And so, on June 22, at 8 am, I quietly slipped out of the apartment, leaving my sleeping husband and children in the bedroom, and crawled to the ultrasound. And on the screen – yin and yang. Well, you know, such a circle, divided in half, with two dots in each half. Twins! I immediately started shaking, took a picture of the picture on the printout with trembling hands, in a trembling voice clarified if they could accidentally split into triplets, and went home. On the way, I went to the bakery, bought chocolate eclairs, quietly entered the bedroom, handed them to my husband, and said that we would have twins. My husband said something that is currently prohibited from printing in magazines, took the eclairs, and went to work. We didn’t discuss it any further; we accepted it as a fact.
It’s worth noting that since the pregnancy was somewhat unplanned, the option of abortion was also considered. After all, when I announced the second pregnancy, the first thing my mom asked was, “Are you going to have an abortion?” But I always dreamed of twins! So this option was ruled out immediately after the ultrasound.
The next day, early in the morning, I took the necessary tests and finally went with my parents and children to the country house. Which posed a big problem for me: I had to confess to my parents, I couldn’t hide it for long, if only because I had to regularly travel from the country to the city for various examinations and tests. I couldn’t think of anything to justify regular trips to the city without them and without the kids. But how to confess? I decided to start from afar, and somehow after lunch, I told my parents that Ksyu was pregnant. The parents laughed, and my mom said that same thing “So you’ll have to be too!”, to which I replied, “But I already am!”. In the ensuing silence, I added, “It’s twins.”
For the next two weeks, my mom didn’t talk to me. At all. She performed her duties (she always cooks and washes dishes at the cottage), but there were no conversations between us. Then she reconciled and started talking, but for the rest of the time, she sighed heavily and lamented about how I would cope.
