In every relationship, there are ups and downs, moments of joy, and times of struggle. One Reddit user recently shared his personal challenges within his marriage, due to his wife’s poor hygiene habits.
While he does admit he has his own faults and the difficulties they face, his main concern is his wife’s wellbeing and the impact this is all having on their intimacy. Keep reading to get the full story…
Taking to the Relationships forum on Reddit, the man wrote about his current relationship situation.
“My wife and I have marriage problems, no doubt about it. Sometimes I’m an a*****e, sometimes she’s a b***h. Most of the time though, we get along and everything is good. We found out she was pregnant when we were way too young, not long into our relationship and not married. We have stuck together and tried very hard to raise our son the way we think is ‘right’, despite a lot of s**t not working out like we wanted it to,” the man explained.
He revealed that, while they are “long past the puppy love stage,” he has a different sort of love and respect for his wife now, whom he refers to as his “best friend.”
Both the man and his wife have battled depression and, as a result, have both put on weight and have low self-confidence. Despite this, the Redditor wrote that he has taken small steps to slowly gain back his confidence and lead a healthier lifestyle.
“My wife is not like me. I feel like she has given up,” the man wrote. “She has had insurance throughout our marriage, but hardly ever goes to the doctor, even when she thinks something is wrong (like polycystic fibrosis).”
He added that his wife hasn’t gone to the dentist since getting married, and has poor oral hygiene. “Her teeth are yellowing and there is often nasty white buildup around her gums on her bottom teeth,” he said.
In his post, the man wrote that his wife makes unhealthy dietary choices, and that she has terrible body odor that never seems to go away. “She hardly ever gets dressed up or wears make-up, and her hair is usually pulled up in a knot, lying flat on her head. This doesn’t help her appearance out at all, because it makes her face look even more overweight,” he wrote.
As a result of all of this, the man has unfortunately refused to sleep next to his wife in bed due to her habits. He wrote that he has been honest with his wife about her hygiene and unhealthy lifestyle, but that she takes it personally and is refusing to change.
Many Redditors took to the comments section to give the man their advice, with one person writing: “All of those issues are rooted in her depression. Happy, mentally stable people do not ignore hygiene and make themselves physically unappealing like this. It’s a cycle that is self fulfilling. She’s depressed, so she doesn’t take care of herself. She gets negative reactions to her physical appearance and her husband rejects her, which makes her more depressed. Rinse, repeat.”
Another added: “What if you did something like pay for a spa day for her (or for both of you together)? Get skin treatments, pedicures, maybe even hair cuts or whatever, to sort of turn the body-care stuff into a luxurious treat. Remind her that it can feel good to take care of your body.”
What do you think about this tricky situation? Let us know in the comments!